When the fat lady sings

One chapter ends, the next begins, and it's all going to be okay in the end.

You need to read this story

Another IM conversation with my brother telling me the oh, so touching story of butter dick. Enjoy.

Podcast 37

My boo Brian and I review Alice in Wonderland. Like all things we do, it's awesome, so listen.

Dave Matthews Band - You & Me

Pretty much been listening to this song non-stop for the last couple of days, so you should listen to it with me. We can pretend we're sitting on the grass together, looking up at the night sky and imagining a better place.

More random complaining.

You'd think I'd be sick of it by now, wouldn't you? Complaining. Actually, I'm not going to complain this time. I'm going to talk about a weird kind of clarity I've been experiencing over the last couple of days. I've been thinking about a lot of stuff lately and all this thinking has solidified some stuff in my mind that has had a kind of freeing effect. It's a good feeling in a strange kind of way because now I can take action, which is always the better way of things in my mind. Thinking is fine, but it doesn't really change anything, does it? Someone asked me on Formspring why I always seem unhappy and it kind of struck a cord with me. If strangers pick up on a sense of unhappiness, what do people in my life pick up on? Anyway, life and time are not my enemies.

So here's the thing...

The problem with blogs is that the only time some people feel compelled to post is when they want to bitch about something, which can get tiresome after awhile. This is pArticularly true of me lately. I only seem motivated to write something when I'm bothered or troubled in some way. It's got me wondering why this is the case. Wouldn't you think people would want to share the best of their lives if they are so willing to share the worst? For instance, I've only felt like writing all the stupid angsty shit I've been partial to lately. It's as if I'm 17 again. However there doesn't seem to be an end in sight for the angst, so buckle I

The funks hit everybody.

I'm starting to think this mid-life crisis thing (for women, anyway) is just the angst years. For men, this happens more in their early 20's. Lucky us, we get to be all emo at the same time our kids are. It's amazing how much of my time is spent brooding. It's pathetic, really, but I can't seem to escape it. And it never even seems to be about anything specific, it's just a general malaise and feeling of lack of ease. I don't know if it's about having this feeling where there's so much potential bottled up inside with no clear idea of how to release it, but I'm thinking it's at least part of it. Or maybe it's not so much lacking a clear idea of how to release it as much as it is there are just others responsibilities that have to come first. I'm almost starting to think it's part of why I try to keep myself so busy lately. Down time means I get lost in my thoughts, and that's kind of a dangerous place to be right now.

What am I up to now?

Right now I'm in my office uploading a bunch of software on my new iMac--which is super sweet, I must say. This is my last day of vacation and I'm in the office. Eh, it had to be done so that I could jump right into what I've got to get done when I come back in tomorrow. It was a pretty mellow week, though. Just hung around with my daughter while she was on spring break. Things pick up for me next weekend when I start doing crew for a show, but that's kind of how I like things.

Can I tell you how much I want an iPod Touch? I really, really, really, really want an iPod Touch. I don't even want it for the music, my iPod Nano is still doing just fine in that department. I want it purely for the internet applications. I've never wanted a gadget so badly in my life. It's bizarre, to tell you the truth. I don't know what about it has got me so hot to trot. But it has, oh, it has. Strangely enough, I do not want an iPad. I saw one at Best Buy (which I must add is a store where I never shop and never will again after they screwed me over with one of their pay interest-free bullshit plans, but I digress) and there was nothing about it that made me want it. It's too big to carry around in your purse, which is a key purchase consideration for me. If I can't carry it around in my purse, it's basically useless to me. So, if anyone out there is thinking they'd like to do something super swell for me just because, well wink, wink.

Podcast episode 36

My boo and I review About Last Night. We originally filmed it for our gone-too-soon webshow, but wanted to share the review with you regardless. It'll make you laugh. I promise. Listen. It'll make you feel good.

I will break you.

Went skating last night with a few of the other gals interested in doing roller derby. I made the mistake of taking my daughter, who had a miserable time, which then forced me to leave early so she could escape the boredom of watching grown women try to figure out how to keep from falling on their asses every two seconds. Other than that, it was not too bad a time and I even broke a sweat. This isn't too surprising, though, because I break a sweat the moment I begin to do anything physical. Don't know why, just another one of my unfortunate quirks. I did do better than I expected considering I haven't skated since I was a teenager, which was a very long time ago. So, it looks like I'll be continuing on with this new adventure for now.

Speaking of adventures, I'm going to my first ever drag show tonight. I'm kind of excited about it. I just hope it's good. I'm a little bit afraid it won't be real drag queens, just some hairy men wearing their mother's housecoat. That would be incredibly unfortunate.

Life's just a big old party, ain't it?

Man, coming to the end of a very busy few weeks. Today and tomorrow are the last shows in the Little Shop of Horrors run and then it's on to a little bit of down time. I originally thought I'd try out for another show that I'd like to do right away, but I think my daughter's been missing me a bit lately, so I'm going to take a bit of a break and catch up with her. However, that doesn't mean I'm not going to keep the pots going in the meantime. I want to get into planning and brainstorming for the new webshow idea I've got bubbling. Also, one of my friends is working with another girl to try and organize a roller derby team, which I'm all over if it happens. I've even got a name already. At any rate, there's still a lot I want to jump into even if I'm not performing. I figure I'll have plenty of time to sleep when I'm dead.

Podcast episode 35

What do you get when you mix the cast and crew of Little Shop of Horrors with the karaoke bar? Complete awesomeness, that's what. Listen to how awesome.

Slap Hands

It all kind of speaks for itself, now doesn't it?

Time to catch one breath.

We're on a two-day break from the show until we start up this week's run on Wednesday. Once we start back up, we only get one day off until the show ends on March 21. It's all good, though. I wouldn't be doing it if I didn't absolutely love it. The show is going OK so far. We had some sound problems the first couple of days, but I think they were able to level out the mics on Sunday, so it will hopefully be smooth sailing from here on out. As it is, I've already got another webshow idea percolating in the old noggin. I'm hoping to get at least one episode off with the people I'd like to do it with. If we can manage that much, it's a good thing. I don't want to talk about it too much, though, because I'd like to get things more concrete before I get too carried away with it. At any rate, I'm going  to just keep my fingers crossed that we don't run into any "complications" this time around. Here's a picture of me and my friend from the show. We're renaming it The Little Shop of Whores.

All good things must come to an end. Sigh.

Just a video goodbye to everyone who watched and laughed during the short time we were around.

Well, this just sucks.

Due to an incredibly unfortunate set of circumstances, my friend and I have had to pull the plug on KC & Sunshine Boy. Without getting into too much detail that is not mine to openly broadcast, Sunshine Boy has to bow out of the show. I am supremely bummed out about this turn of events. We were having such a good time, and I think we were making people laugh. Maybe I'm deluded in thinking that, but at least we were making ourselves laugh, and that was okay with me. I'd like to think that I'll be able to team up with someone else to continue with some sort of show, but coming up with the idea to do KC & Sunshine Boy with my friend was kind of a serendipitous moment, and those don't come along too often. But, I will not give up the ghost. You just never know who or what will cross your path. I sort of feel like crying right now, but it's not the sort of behavior I normally allow myself to succumb to and it doesn't really change anything. So until KC can walk again, I bid adieu to one hell of a good time that ended way too soon.

Daddy don't like it.

I got a call yesterday from my father and the first thing he said when I got on the phone was, "Can we talk about KC & Sunshine Boy?" I laughed and told him we could but that I was going to keep doing it. He said he figured that would be the case, but he had to say what he had to say. I knew my dad wouldn't like the content of the videos I'd put up, but I also know that the show is going to be more than the little snippets we've been putting up. I know it's probably easy for people to assume from watching the previews that the show is just going to be all about sex, but it's not. It really is meant to be a humorous talk show with some filmed sketch comedy segments thrown in to augment the episode's theme. Our first show's theme is "Helpful Sex Tips When You First Start Staying Over."

My dad basically asked me to stop doing sex stuff, and I can understand his discomfort. He's worried that people connected to my daughter will get a wind of it and harass her in some way. The truth is, that's the main reason why I try not to connect my name with show. I'm not ashamed or embarrassed about what I'm doing in the least, and if I didn't have to worry about my daughter, I'd be pretty open with claiming it. I'm really not the sort of person who tries to hide who I am, but my daughter has no control over what I do, so she shouldn't be put at risk of being criticized for my decisions.

My father and I didn't get into an argument or anything, and I completely understand his need to tell me he wished I would go about doing the show in a different way, but I think what my friend and I are doing is hysterical and funny and I'll keep doing it until I think otherwise. KC really is just a character to me, in the same way as any character I portray on stage. She's just a character that I put on the internet. I guess it would be nice if people could understand more easily that she might possess elements of me, but she's not me.

As it turns out, my friend had a similar conversation with his mother. I'm taking it to mean we must be doing something right.

KC & Sunshine Boy preview 5

We share our insights on many issues.

KC & Sunshine Boy preview #4

The latest look into the excitement and wonder that are KC & Sunshine Boy. Don't hate us because we're beautiful.

This much fun should probably be illegal.

As I'm sure you can tell from my last few posts, my friend and I are well in the thick of filming the first episode of our webshow KC & Sunshine Boy. To say we're having a blast just doesn't do justice to the crazy amount of fun we're having doing this. I've been wanting to do something like this for such a long time, I can't even tell you how long because I can't remember a time before wanting to do it. We've had three filming sessions to date and even ventured out last night to do a little "location" shooting at Wal-Mart. Here are a few stills from the footage we shot last night.

Doesn't it look like we had fun? You know why? Because we did. I'm hoping to put together another preview video this weekend with what we got. I bet you guys can't WAIT. Can you? Yeah, I hear ya. Longing is a terrible, terrible thing.