August 15, 2007

What to say?

I'm sitting painting my toenails because I leave for my 20th high school reunion tomorrow. I'm painting them "rapid ruby." In some ways, I feel like I want to talk about going to the reunion, and in other ways, I really don't. Which I think makes sense because it probably reflects both the excitement and apprehension I feel about going. Excitement because I can't wait to see friends I haven't seen in a long time and apprehensive because I don't want to be bored playing nice to people I never liked. I know, I'm a bitch. My daughter starts school tomorrow and I'm actually more consumed with that right now than I am with reunion stuff. Let me show you the ravages of twenty years. This is me in high school.

And this is me now.

See how skinny I used to be? The bummer is that I didn't think I was skinny back then. I've pretty much always considered myself to be a little on the chunky side. But when I look at pictures of myself in high school and college, well anything before I had my daughter, I realize I wasn't fat at all. Why can't we appreciate the good things when we've got them? So, anyway, I've been doing all this "reflecting" on my life and whether or not I've spent my life well. When I look back so far, there are definitely things I'd do differently. I'd definitely have traveled more before having my daughter. The simple fact is you just can't pick up and take off any old time when you've got kids. Everything is about their school schedules and social lives. I also wish I would have taken better advantage of the opportunities that are available in college, like study abroad programs and stuff like that.

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