August 24, 2007

Story from reunion, although not about reunion.

I will talk about the reunion one day. I promise. Until then, let me tell you a story I heard while at the reunion. One of my former classmates is a doctor. I think she has probably spent most of her time serving disenfranchised communities. She told us that during her residency she worked some time in Appalachia where she had a woman come in with a very interesting complaint. According to my classmate, the woman came in and said. "I got vines growin' down there."

Being perplexed, my friend asked, "What?"

"I got vines down there."

Still confused about what this woman could be suffering from, my friend performs an examination and finds that, indeed, the woman does have vines growing down there. It turns out the woman had inserted a piece of potato (possibly for contraceptive purposes) into her vagina and then forgot about it, giving it time to sprout. According to my friend the "vines" had gotten to a length where they were hanging out of the woman's underpants. When I asked what the potato looked like when she removed it, my friend said, "Exactly what you think it would look like." EWWW!

Now, I ask you, even if you had inserted a piece of potato up your cooch and forgotten about it, wouldn't you remember when you looked down to see something worthy of a 4-H ribbon growing out of there? I think I would.

Here's a picture of a rotten potato, just in case you were wondering what one would look like.

Mmm, mmm, mmm. We're having au gratin tonight.

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