Kids! Can't kill 'em and beating 'em doesn't work.

I've been exchanging e-mails over the past couple of days with my friend who told me that her 7-year-old son invited some friends to come over for Thanksgiving dinner, only to be told they'd only come if it was going to be a party with naked girls or nearly-naked girls. It seems they wanted some boobage to cast their eyes upon. Then these boys wanted to later take these topless beauties in the bedroom to enthrall them with their 7-year-old sex skills. Needless to say, my friend was somewhat disgusted and dumbfounded that boys that young would even know about stuff like that. Of course, I'm using the word "know" very, very loosely. She complained that it seems like just yesterday that she held her little baby boy and fed him and changed his diaper and now, all of a sudden, he's a pig just like the rest of them. I told her I think the whole tit fascination MUST stem from some fond infantile breastfeeding memory. I mean, really, what else can it be? We women, we don't get why men think boobs are such a big deal. We compare it to looking at your scrotum and can't understand what's so great. Anyway, I told her while her sweet little boy is dreaming of sexing up the ladies, my sweet little girl is practicing unmanning them. If you ask her what to do if a boy bothers her, she says, "Kick them in the wiener." And she says it with a lot of passion and gusto and a real bloodlust that, I must confess, scares even me a little. I really think she's just waiting for the opportunity to have a legitimate reason to knock a couple of balls into the top of some poor boy's mouth. I think the main reason for this is that I've told her this is a last-resort, self-defense technique. This is to be used in the event that she is in real physical danger and not to be done if the boy does something stupid like pull a ponytail. So she understands that slamming the nuts hurts, and that it hurts badly. I think she wants to see just how badly it hurts. You know, she wants to know if it will really make a boy puke his guts out from pain. It's really just scientific curiosity, but I'm a little frightened for the boy who does her wrong.